Its 1am. Thinking back, I wonder if I should have sat with him. It was the end our first European trip together. I wanted to upgrage my view, my seat, the service and enjoy the benefits of working hard. Is it better to be the ant who stored up for a rainy day? What if your life stopped days, weeks or even years before the rainy day. Then what? Was all your hard work pointless? Maybe thats why some communities celebrate your death with a Homecoming. Because thats where your reward is. You may not have experienced worldly pleasures but your servitude in dedication, honor and understanding will be given to you in the afterlife. Your belief in hope alone was intoxicating. It gave me double vision, where I could see twice as far into my future with you. I started to see forever. I started to see us. But where did I go? Ive lost sight of myself. I wanted to feel alive. I wanted to enjoy luxury, to indulge but not tooverdose. I saw nothing wrong with it. So for that last leg of our trip you watched me feast on champagne, laydown flat and watch endless movies from behind the curtain.